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Clowns are Faithful

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It seems that I've spent much of my life standing motionless in the rain The tears I've cried and still do can easily go unnoticed down the drain I am very blessed and grateful that I've made some headway here But that doesn't mean the work is done and the path is free and clear That is so and I'm positive I know, because the lonely wolf remains I wrecked so much, I ran them off with my demons and my fears The love of few, the distractions I used, hoping the end was finally near I never really realized that you can't easily self-medicate the crazy all away But yet I did and never veered, ready to fuck it up until forever and a day Little things still snag me and make me go into orbit, I guess they always will The things that hurt the deepest now are not the ones that cripple, ruin and kill It's the wasted time I squandered, the minutes and the hours, and far too many days It's the love I should have cultivated with so many lovely people I met